


No One Else

by Birdybirp



Category: Ghost (Sweden Band)
Genre: Cute, F/M, Fluff, Self-Insert, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-04-24
Packaged: 2019-11-07 15:28:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17963174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Birdybirp/pseuds/Birdybirp
Summary: Sister Fae is a new Sister of Sin who entered the church after her grandmother passed away. She was content with keeping to herself, restoring old works of Satanic art. She tries her best to resist a crush she develops on a certain Cardinal, but when does that ever work out?This is just pure self-indulgence for me when I get sad. But, if people want fluff (with eventual smut), here you go.





	1. The First Time I Heard Your Voice

**Author's Note:**

> This is just me writing things about my self-insert, Sister Fae, whenever I get an idea for her. I mostly write this when I feel sad, so it's just all fluff to cheer me up. If you like it, cool. Otherwise, it's just here for me.

Fae was always one to burn the midnight oil. That night, she was finishing up patching a tear from top to bottom of a portrait of Beelzebub. It looked like someone had slashed it with a knife which well might have been the case. People who did not understand the religion loved to desecrate works made in the name of The Devil. It always made Fae sad because she saw all art as valuable, especially a piece as old as this portrait was.

 

She had closed the tear with layers and layers of wheat starch and the substance had finally dried. She had collected several bowls and placed them around her work station, ready to mix paints so she could finish her project. But once she took at seat at her stool, she felt a wave of exhaustion hit her. She had been standing up for most of the day, leaning over the massive canvas to repair it. Now that she had taken the weight off her feet, she stopped to consider what time it was.

 

Outside, the sky had gone dark hours ago. Snow was falling, the flakes reflected in the light of the full moon high in the sky. Her workshop was, thankfully, entirely lit with fluorescent lights so she could keep working through the night. The downside to this, though, is that she rarely noticed when the sun went down because there wasn’t a major change to the lighting that surrounded her.

 

As she looked at the falling snow, she realized that it was freezing. The windows had to remain open to allow for ventilation of all the chemicals used in her work, which left the room vulnerable to the outside temperatures. Fae could see little wisps of her breath leave her mouth if she looked hard enough. She frowned, reminding herself that she needed to put a clock in the room. She was determined to finish her work, though, so she pushed through the cold and her exhaustion. To keep herself awake, she turned on music over the workshop speakers.

 

The paints were slightly thicker than they should have been because of the cold, which made applying them in a similar thickness to the original paint a nightmare. The tiredness that hung at her eyelids made her focus waver and she almost ruined the arch of the demon’s wing. She still tried to push through, though, until the cold sunk deep enough in to her bones she was shivering. She finally gave up when her hands could no longer hold her brushes steady. In a huff about having to quit, Fae picked up the bowls of paint and cleaned them out in the deep sink at the back of the workshop along with her brushes. She silently cursed that the sink was not attached to the hot water heater as ice cold water froze her fingers even more. The loud music aggravated her and it banged against her brain as it begged for sleep. When the bowls and brushes were clean, Fae dried off her hands, killed the music, turned off the workshop lights, and locked the door behind her.

 

The walk back to her dorm room was a long one, especially when she was already cold. She walked at a brisk pace, willing the fast movement to heat her body. She crossed her arms over her chest and shoved her frozen fingertips under her arms to save them from the stinging cold that numbed them. She felt cold swirling around her ears and realized that she had left her veil back in her workshop, having taken it off so it wouldn’t impede her work. She swore under her breath, feeling too cold and tired to turn around and go get it. She would just have to sneak in and get it in the morning before someone noticed her without it and told Sister Imperator.

 

The hallways were warmer than her workspace, but not by much. The old building had probably never heard of modern insulation. Fae cursed the place she called home, walking faster to get back to her room. She would have to pile on blankets when she got there since her room wasn’t equipped with a fireplace.

 

She turned a corner, almost halfway back to her room, when she saw that the library door was open. This was strange as no one should have been awake but her. She peered into the open door and saw the warm light of the fireplace flickering across the walls, battling against the white of the moonlight that came in through the windows. Maybe someone had forgotten to snuff out the fire and left the library unlocked? They must have been in a hurry. Either way, Fae was not about to look a gift horse in the mouth. The fireplace was exactly what she needed, and if anyone asked why she was in there after hours, she could just say she came to put out the fire because someone had forgotten to.

 

She slunk her way through the numerous bookshelves and around the piles of unorganized books, on the lookout for anyone who would see her. She could feel the warmth of the fire grow the farther she moved in to the library and wanted to hurry next to it, but didn’t want to be reckless. Finally, she cleared the bookshelves and could see the fireplace. They built it in to the farthest wall of the room, with a few chairs facing it, to make a nice reading nook. She couldn’t see anyone in the chairs, which were facing away from her, so she darted around them and knelt directly in front of the fireplace.

 

She held her hands as close to the fire as she dared, feeling the heat relax the frozen muscles in her fingers. She sat down on the floor, crossing her legs as a sigh of relief left her. She felt the warmth reach her face and chest and her body slowly thawed. She felt like she could fall asleep right there, and almost did, except--

 

“Late night, Sister?”

 

Fae gasped and frantically turned to face the voice that spoke. She was close enough to the fire she almost fell in.

 

“Careful...” the voice was soft and concerned. It belonged to the new transfer to the church, Cardinal Copia. He looked just as tired as Fae felt, eyes red and droopy. His body was slumped in to the chair he was in, which would explain why Fae hadn’t seen him sitting in it. He had been reading, the book placed upside down in his lap so he could focus on her, mismatched gaze feeling intense despite his sleepiness.

 

“L-L-Late night yourself, Your Eminence?” Fae tried to recover from the shock and play it off cooly, but her stammering voice betrayed her. The Cardinal straightened up in his seat, the moonlight behind him framing his head and making it look like he was glowing. Members of the upper clergy already intimidated Fae to begin with. Being caught by one in the middle of the night made her anxiety crank up to 11. He wouldn’t move his eyes from her and that made it that much worse. _And she didn’t have her veil on._ **_Fuck._ **

 

“I was.... I saw that the fire was still lit... I worried someone hadn’t put it out.” she hastily lied, turning to face the cardinal, sitting on her knees. She rested her hands in her lap, thumbs twiddling nervously.

 

“You looked like you enjoyed the warmth, though.” Copia’s gaze softened and Fae felt a bit of tension leave her.

 

“Well.... It is cold, Your Eminence. It’s been snowing.” That statement seemed to catch Copia off guard. He looked confused before leaning over the side of his chair to look out the window.

 

“So it has...” he said, sitting up straight in the chair. “That doesn’t explain why you were out this late, though.” he chided. Fae’s shoulders tensed. He had her there. She felt a blush of embarrassment and nervousness bloom across her cheeks.

 

“Y-you see...” she started. “I was just.... I had work to do for Sister Imperator and lost track of time.” She hoped that throwing the name of Imperator around would make her story seem more credible.

 

“And, if I ask her, she will corroborate this?” Fae looked away from him and Copia let out a light, airy laugh.

 

“I really was working, though. I... get lost in it sometimes.” Fae put her hand to the back of her neck, obviously still embarrassed. “I... like what I do.”

 

“As do I.” A kind smile played on the Cardinal’s lips and Fae felt her heart speed up and her blush deepen. “What do you do that you enjoy so much, Sister?”

 

“I restore old art pieces...” She had always thought her passion was strange. Enjoying gluing pieces of paper back together and fixing art that wasn’t your own is not what many people would consider ‘fun’. A lot of the siblings thought she was weird for spending all day in her workshop and then leaving smelling strongly of chemicals.

 

“Ah! You are Sister Fae! You restored the piece in Papa Nihil’s office, yes? _The Fallen Lucifer?”_ Fae nodded slightly. She was proud of that piece, especially because the leader of the church liked it enough to put it in his office. It surprised her that someone had told the Cardinal about her though. She felt like she was not worth mentioning; insignificant in the grand plan of the church.

 

The Sister and the Cardinal sat in silence for a moment, just looking at each other. Looking in his eyes, Fae felt a strange warmth in her chest that couldn’t be explained by the fire. It caught her entirely off guard. She had never been one of the Sisters who fell for other church members. She was barely a person to fall for anyone at all.  There were Sisters who had a laundry list of lovers, and sometimes Fae envied them. Most girls at least fell for the Papa who initiated them, but Fae hadn't had her ritual yet. She felt out of place for being in a church that indulged in sin without feeling the sin of lust herself.

 

But there, in the library, surrounded by moon and firelight, Fae felt a yearning in her chest for the man who looked upon her with kindness. It felt strange, almost unwelcome. She had only been a member of the church for six months. She wasn’t even close to becoming a higher ranking Sister, so a crush on a man like the Cardinal would easily go unrequited. She didn’t want to risk herself being hurt. But what if the Cardinal was feeling the same way in that moment? Could he possibly be feeling the same pull in his chest as he looked at her? She decided it was unlikely.

 

“Ah, I apologize.” his voice cut through the silence and Fae looked away from Copia’s eyes, not wanting to get lost in them again. “Sister, I am Cardinal Copia.” He put his hand to his heart and bowed slightly at the waist. Far felt another throb in her chest at the gesture.

 

“Yes, I saw your first sermon last week.” she said. Copia looked happy for a moment, seeming to wait for her critique of his performance. “It was well spoken.”

 

“Heh, th-thank you.” A light shade of pink formed on the Cardinal’s face as he smiled at her, eyes crinkling closed. He seemed nervous, not used to praise. It was endearing and Fae almost hated him for it. She didn’t reason to feel anything for him.

 

“It was nice meeting you, Cardinal.” Fae stood, deciding to leave before her heart exploded out of her chest. “I apologize for disturbing you.” She went to move past him and out of the library, but Copia gently grabbed her hand before she could go.

 

“A pleasure meeting you, Sister Fae.” he said, looking at her hand in his. “I hope... I hope I see you again.” His voice was soft, almost a whisper. Fae wasn’t sure she could blush any harder.

 

"And I won't tell Sister Imperator that you lost your veil." His eyes flickered up to her, mischievously. Fae absently reached up and touched her head, fingers touching her pixie length red hair. Her missing veil was the least of her worries at the moment.

 

“Y-yes...I.... Well.... Goodbye.” she removed her hand from his and hustled out of the library. Her face still burned hot, not able to feel the chill of the night through her own blush. She had seen the girls who followed Copia, all doll eyed and giggly, and she had never understood why. Now, after having looked into his eyes and having seen him smile at her, she got it.

 

She thought more on the pack of girls who had sworn their devotion to the Cardinal. Most of them beautiful senior Sisters. There were so many hats thrown in to the ring for Copia’s affections. Though the throbbing of her heart said she should try, she decided that there was no way she would ever win. She would bottle this up. It was just a childish crush. As she reached her room, though, all she could think about were his eyes in the moonlight and the feeling of his hand holding her’s.


	2. A Gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fae tries to do something nice for the Cardinal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I'm not dead. Other works will be updated soon, but this is the first thing I actually got finished. Special thanks to Erik, who writes The Son Who Comes, for making me so sad with a chapter update that it forced me to write fluff to make myself feel better.

Fae never knew what to do when she was in someone else’s space.

 

She was standing in the middle of Cardinal Copia’s room while the Cardinal in question looked for a specific book about the painting she was restoring. In all honesty, she didn’t need the book. She had made up an excuse to see the cardinal. Since their encounter in the library, Fae had tried to ignore the small crush she had on the new clergyman. That was, obviously, going terribly.

 

Sure, she wasn’t fawning over him like some other Sisters. Fae knew that Sisters would fall at his feet because new blood in the water is always interesting. No, she had been making excuses to use his knowledge to help with her art restorations. She told herself that she needed the help; that she wasn’t just trying to see him. Knowing about the piece she was restoring was important, right? She had never needed to have historical knowledge on the paintings before, but now she had an expert. So that would make her work better…. right?

 

Regardless of her motivations, she had made her way into Copia’s room. Books were piled in precarious stacks over a majority of the room. There were also bookshelves that couldn’t possibly fit another text on them. Fae didn’t know what to do in the messy space. She was afraid to touch anything and didn’t even know what to look for. Copia was rifling through stacks, opening certain books to random pages, shaking his head, and placing the book back where he found it.

 

“Have you read these?” Fae asked. Copia paused, as if he was mentally running through a list of every book in the room, before nodding.

 

“All of them?” Fae pressed.

 

“Yes.” Copia said, sounding certain. “I have... a lot of free time.” Fae had never seen the cardinal with a spare moment to breathe, let alone read, so she looked at him quizzically. Copia shied away from her gaze, going back to sifting through the mountains of books. In his haste, Copia knocked a book off of a stack. It fell right at Fae’s feet and she picked up the blue-bound book and thumbed through the pages. Just in the center of the book, Fae found a photo wedged in the pages. It was an old photo, the paper it was printed on was yellowed and brittle.

 

Fae delicately pulled the photo from the book to see what it was.

 

The photo was in sepia; the color having faded because of light exposure. It was a farmhouse sitting isolated in the middle of a field. To call it quaint would be an understatement. The walls were old stone, archaic windows carved out of the sides, and a thatched roof. There was a tilled field in the foreground, looking like someone had abandoned it long ago. Wildflowers had overtaken the grassy areas, growing to what looked like knee height. At the bottom, scrawled in neat script and fading ink, was _“Home@1913.”_

 

“Careful!” Copia had seen her with the picture and looked absolutely terrified, his hand feebly outstretched towards her.

 

“I handle delicate art for a living, I won’t hurt it.” Fae chided him and he looked embarrassed and she immediately felt bad for not biting her tongue.

 

“What is this, anyway?” Fae asked, turning the picture around delicately to see if there was anything on the back. “Is this an old heirloom photo?”

 

“It’s... uh...” Copia seemed panicked. “It’s... My old home.”

 

“You lived here?” Fae asked, incredulous.

 

“Yes.” Copia sounded offended at her shock.

 

“Did it look like this when you lived there?”

 

“No!” He sounded even more offended and Fae mentally slapped herself. What good did she think insulting him would do? At this rate, he would kick her out for being so rude.

 

“Sorry... sorry.” Her voice was tinged with embarrassment. “Was this taken before you lived there, then? It’s dated 1913.”

 

“Uh... no...” Copia licked his lips, still nervous. “I... eh... I took that.” He had returned to searching through books and wouldn’t look at her.

 

“You took this in 1913?” Fae couldn’t be more confused. “Is this a joke?” Copia shook his head.

 

“It’s a long story. I’d rather not talk about it.” Copia’s voice was fragile. This was obviously a sensitive topic, so Fae diverted.

 

“Why was it in a book?” Fae asked. Obviously it was important to him.

 

“Damaged...” He muttered the word, still flipping through books and not looking at her. He wasn’t wrong. The light damage was one thing, but the photo was also brittle. Fae had to handle it with a gentle touch to keep it from crumbling in her hands. She studied it, wondering if there was a way she could restore it. Unfortunately, it was too fragile and the process to restore it would turn it to dust. But there was something else she could do.

 

“I could try to preserve it?” Fae offered and Copia’s brow furrowed. “I can’t restore it, but I have some small frames in my shop and I could see if I have one that would fit this.” Copia looked positively touched.

 

“You... You don’t have to.” A light pink bloomed on his face as he tried to brush her off.

 

“It seems important to you, though...” Fae gently put the picture back in the book and closed it.

 

“It is, it is.” He sighed, gesturing vaguely with his hands, trying to find the right way to explain his feelings. “I... don’t want you to trouble yourself.”

 

“I’d just be putting it in a frame. It’s no trouble at all.” Copia just shrugged, which Fae took to mean _‘If you want to’_. Fae shrugged back and hugged the book to her chest. It was just framing a picture, right? What harm could that do?

 

~~~

 

It was late in to the night, and Fae was staring at the antique photo on her worktable. She couldn’t find a frame small enough for the Polaroid sized photo. She was getting annoyed. What was she doing? Why was she making such a big deal out of this? She paced around her workshop before plopping down in her chair and glaring at the photograph on her desk.

 

As she huffed over the picture, she wondered what it would have looked like in person. What color were the wildflowers? What did the sky look like there? Why didn’t Copia have a color photo? Surely between 1913 and today, he could have gone back and taken an updated one instead of holding on to a decaying, ancient picture?

 

_What if it’s not there anymore?_

 

The thought hit Fae right in her gut. It has been over a century since the picture had been taken, and the home was in shambles then. The chances of such an old house surviving the elements for hundreds of years with no upkeep were slim to none. What if this decaying photograph was the last thing that remained of it?

 

Fae suddenly felt homesick for a place she had never been to. She wondered if Copia felt homesick every time he looked at the photo. Maybe that was why had been shoved in a random book? She felt guilty for pushing so hard to preserve the photo. She must have dredged up some bad memories for him. She groaned and put her head in her hands. She was trying hard, too hard really, to get Copia to notice her, and she was just offending him and making him remember things he’d rather not.

 

Fae glanced back down at the photo and had the same thought again.

 

_What color were the wildflowers?_

 

And suddenly, she had an idea.

 

~~~

 

Fae had crossed the line from ‘doing a nice thing for someone’ and was officially trying too hard.

 

She had hauled a small canvas, a handful of paintbrushes, an easel, and bags full of paints to her room. She would usually do any of her artistic projects in her workshop to keep the mess in her quarters to a minimum, but she was already out way past curfew and she wanted no one to see her little project.

 

But after all that effort to get the supplies there and hours of painting, Fae was second guessing herself.

 

She had used vibrant colors to bring the farmhouse to life. Purple and yellow flowers, soft grey stone, rolling green fields. She chose the colors she liked, but was worried she had missed the mark. The painting was nice, but would it be something the cardinal would like?

 

“Is this weird?” she asked herself, staring at the painting. She had just said she would frame the photo, which she would do eventually, but giving the cardinal a painting seemed a little too eager. But she already had it done. She could just throw it away and pretend this never happened, or just hide it away until she had more courage to give it to the cardinal.

 

But she hated to waste hard work like that…

 

But what if she came off too eager when she gave it to him...?

 

But what if he liked it...?

_But what if he hated it...?_

 

The internal debate was exhausting. It was nearly 4AM, and she felt like she was losing her mind.

 

_It’s just a painting. Just give it to him._

 

_But it’s a painting about something he cares deeply about..._

 

She continued to flip-flop in her mind until something broke in her brain.

 

_You know what? Fuck it._

 

It also struck her that, because of the late hour, she could easily just drop off the painting without saying a word to the Cardinal. It was perfect. At least, to her 4AM sleep deprived brain it was perfect. Fae quickly set about writing a hasty note to include with the painting before grabbing the canvas, the note, and the book with the original photo in it, and scurrying off in to the dark corridors.

 

She walked as fast as she could in the darkness. Ghouls roamed around at night and she didn’t want to be seen by anyone. She ducked in to corners and hustled her way to Copia’s room. She stood outside of the door for a moment; her nerves telling her to run away. But she was already there. She gave her note a final read through:

 

_Cardinal,_

_I couldn’t find a proper frame, so I hope this is a suitable substitute._

_— Sister Fae_

 

It sounded professional and not desperate, which is what she was going for. She carefully leaned the painting against his door-frame with the note perched on top, the book containing the photograph placed just to the side. She positioned it so it wouldn’t fall in to the cardinal’s room when he opened the door. Pleased with her arrangement, Fae booked it back to her room to get a few hours of sleep.

 

Little did she know, her anxiety would keep her from closing her eyes for even a minute. Her worries had evolved from _“What if he hates it?”_ to _“He ABSOLUTELY will hate it.”_ She tried to not think about it, but the effort to not think about it made her think about it more.

 

After tossing and turning for a few hours, Fae’s alarm went off. Great. She was not even slightly prepared to face the day. Could she fake being sick? Probably. Her stomach growled, letting her know that staying in her room would not be an option right then. Maybe she could bury herself in a mountain of hash browns to forget her worries.

 

She quickly showered and dressed, not wanting to get stuck in line for breakfast. As much as she tried to make herself look awake, she felt like a zombie.

 

“That painting was not worth it.” She grumbled to her reflection in the mirror as she fought to keep her eyes open.

 

It would be a long day.

 

Fae let out a large yawn and tried to rub the sleep from her eyes as she opened her door to leave for breakfast. Unfortunately, her walking with her eyes closed led her to crash right in to someone right outside her door.

 

Yep. A long day, for sure.

 

“Shit, I’m sorry.” She said through a yawn to the person she had slammed in to. She rubbed her eyes again before blinking them open. At the sight of the red cassock, her soul wanted to jump out of her body. The Cardinal. She couldn’t get a break.

 

“C-Cardinal I--!”

 

“Sister, can I speak to you for a moment, please?” Copia cut her off and didn’t give her a chance to reply before he grabbed her wrist and pulled her back in to her room, closing the door behind them. From his curt tone, Fae figured she had overstepped in giving him the painting and she was about to be reprimanded. There was a beat of intense silence before Copia pulled Fae in to an embrace, one arm wrapped around her waist and his other hand holding the back of her head as he pulled her close.

 

“Thank you.” His chin rested on her shoulder as he whispered his thanks. Fae was too shocked to respond. She was stiff as a board, not sure if she should hug him back or not.

 

“N-N-N-No problem at all, Cardinal.” She stammered, wrapping her arms around his waist loosely.  “I saw that it was important to you and I had the time, I mean I had the supplies and the time, I mean, I thought you would like it. Did I get the colors right?” she rambled, not taking a breath.

 

“Perfectly.” Copia said while chuckling at her nervousness. Fae felt her heart skip a beat. She cautiously hugged him a little tighter, leaning in to him. He smelled like lavender and incense.

 

“I’m glad you like it.” Fae said shyly. Copia broke their embrace and Fae awkwardly stepped back from him, her cheeks burning.  She could feel his eyes on her and was too intimidated to meet them.

 

“Did you sleep?” He asked, sounding very much like a father talking to his child.

 

“Yeah... Yeah.” She mumbled. Copia made a noise like he didn’t believe her. “Is it that obvious?” she asked, glancing at Copia who gave a slight shrug and a nod.

 

“Go get breakfast and then come back and rest. I’ll say you were with me all day.”

 

“What?” Copia’s offer caught Fae off guard. It wasn’t like she would turn down the opportunity to sleep, though. “I can... yeah, I can do that.” she said, a yawn sneaking past her lips before she could stop it. Copia chuckled again, and she flushed.

 

“Would you like to have breakfast with me?” The cardinal offered. Fae’s heart skipped a beat again. If this kept up, her feelings for Copia would make her heart stop completely.

 

“That would be nice, actually.” Copia beamed at her response and opened her door, gesturing for her to go through first. Fae was giddy at how well her gift had been received and couldn’t stop a small smile from spreading on her face.

 

 _“I change my mind.”_ She thought as she walked side by side with Cardinal Copia to the cafeteria. _“It was absolutely worth it.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More updates.....eventually.

**Author's Note:**

> If you like this, feel free to comment and/or follow me on tumblr @ just-here-for-copia.tumblr.com


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